To some people this subject will be irrelevant, but the idea of ‘if you don’t ask you don’t get’, irritates me a little. But it’s what the action deep down triggers in our psyche, that worries me more.
This idea came about because I’ve found of late there are more and more people asking me for things. Mainly material things, and I think to myself, really? You want this? You should be wanting to earn this. Not ask me for it. It got me angry, to the point of this blog…
Most of us would agree that life is about the journey. And the longer the journey, generally the more interesting and insightful it is, and almost definitely more rewarding and fulfilling.
Asking for something, is either directly, or indirectly, like asking for a shortcut.
I want to explain the problems with asking.
I do not mean asking for a cup of tea with 2 sugars or a fillet steak with chips!
I mean asking for something that will, or could elevate you somewhere, or to something, resulting in you avoiding a critical experience. It is by truly indulging in these experiences that the possibility of premature success, happiness or fulfilment never materialises.
Shortcuts that are presented to people should be very carefully considered, and almost always rejected, as they enhance the likelihood of a premature outcome or feeling.
I’m not saying that we should never be given a chance, of course we all need opportunities.
I’ve had more opportunities represented to me than nearly anybody growing up. (generally not by asking I’d like to add)
But, people who are given a slightly more, dubious upper hand shall we say, especially early in their careers, are more likely to fail down the line, because they missed out on ever being dealt a ‘bad hand’, or a moment of unjust.
I wanted to show you how my original point means more than what it says. It’s the deepest part of asking for something which is fundamentally incongruent. People see ‘if you don’t ask you don’t get’, as a good thing, as if this notion of forwardness is beneficial. But I don’t believe it is. You should enjoy the prospect of succeeding without the upper hands. The more honest, gladiatorial journey. The journey which you, and others will ultimately cherish.
Finally i just wanted to say who this is directed at mainly.
I want my point to resonate with young people and they’re parents. As it often the parents who do the asking! (But that rant is for another time!)
Do not be afraid of the journey. There is no rush. Whether its 5,10, 20 years. You need to know that it’s going to be long no matter what, so you should want to be completely ready for it when it happens, not only in a professional sense, but also personally.
Asking for something defeats the purpose of the greatest thing in life, the journey of attainment.
I apologise for the ‘deep-ness’ of this post, I know it was only Christmas 3 days ago but my mind seems not to know when’s best to chill out!
Here’s to a happy and prosperous new year!